BULLSH*TTING MY WAY THROUGH MY ESSAY

My sympathy goes out to everyone working on their end of term essays / revising for their upcoming exams, I wish you all the very best of luck !


How am I coping ?



I’m working on a 3000 word-long essay (which isn’t that long if there’s something to write about… if there’s something to write about !)

My Essay Chronology

Phase 1 : I’m sorry, are these even legitimate questions ? Are they incomplete or something ? How am I supposed to answer this ? Oh, look ! It’s got a cave troll !

Phase 2 : Well, I might as well be given half an hour to sew a wedding dress with nothing but tooth-floss at my disposal while having my hands tied behind my back.

Phase 3 : Ok, I’ll simply define every single word in the question and fill in as many quotes as I can. If I manage to reach the minimum word limit, I can say it’s a job well done.

Phase 4 : Right, I’ve got 1000 words. I’ve been bullsh*tting my way through, putting spaces between words and commas so each comma counts as a word and I haven’t even written half as many words as I need. I’m doomed.

Phase 5 : Being annoyed at this won’t solve anything, there’s fairly little I can do at this point. I’ll just try and do my best. It won’t be amazing, but at least I can hand something in.